Mixed Orientation Marriages

This site is about adults in heterosexual relationships (legal or common-law marriages) in which one of them realizes their homosexual (or bisexual) orientation.

Such a situation raises more questions than answers:
How does one find wholeness and integrity within such a relationship or must one leave such a relationship?
How do both partners come to terms with their sexuality in the relationship?
What is the effect on the other spouse, the children, the faith community?

Help with research in this area.

A new study is being conducted on mixed orientation marriages, which are defined as a marriage where one individual experiences same sex attraction and the other does not. The purpose of the study is to understand the characteristics of these marriages and the experiences of individuals in them. Participants can be currently in a mixed orientation marriage or have been previously. If you or someone you know fits this description and would like to share your experience, participants are needed!

The survey can be accessed online by going to www.mixedorientationstudy.com. The study is completely anonymous and confidential; however, participants are given the option of sharing limited contact information in order participate in future follow-up studies, if desired. Your participation would be greatly appreciated!

Here are all the Resource Sites we know of*

  • Married Gay These information screens are for men who are gay or bisexual and married or in a relationship with a woman, and for their wives, partners or girl friends to help them understand what might be going on.

  • Straight Spouse Network an international support network of heterosexual women and men, formerly or currently partnered with gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered mates

  • Alternatepath - a group for women seeking help with finding alternative solutions to divorcing their Bi/Gay husband. We want to provide positive discussions that will help the wives adjust to the news that their husband is gay/bi.

  • HUGS Couples HUGS_Couples is a list for couples of mixed sexual orientation who are working to keep their relationship strong and growing. It provides a positive environment where these couples can EXPRESS their concerns, SHARE their successes, and GIVE and RECEIVE support and encouragement. The requirements for joining are:
    1. The couple is of mixed sexual orientation; that is, one or both partners is g/l/b.
    2. The couple is interested in and working on maintaining their relationship.
    3. The couple desires to receive and give support in a POSITIVE way with other MSO couples.
    4. Since the list is for couples, both partners must join.

  • GAMMA: The Gay Married Men's Association Providing peer counseling, support, and outreach to gay married men, their wives, partners, and friends.

  • Boston Gay & Bisexual Married Men's Support Group
  • * If you find something else that would be useful to list here, please e-mail me.